Life is full of surprises with all its twists and turns. I have just spent the first week living on my own in my two bedroomed duplex! I got to spend my labor day weekend not laboring for anyone but myself. I also enjoyed the company of a friend who was kind enough to invite me over to her place and we shared our life stories. The story of a woman that is almost similar no matter where you come from in the world. Once you become a mother you cease being selfish and carter to the needs of the children whom you innocently brought in to the world. We got to discuss about letting go of the apron strings, but how can a mother do that when that child is flesh of your own flesh and blood of your own blood? Letting go does not matter whether he/she is going a mile away or a thousand miles away. They steal our hearts when they are born, and they hold our hearts to ransom until we die. We bring them up in the best way and pray they will always remember the life lessons given. White, black, yellow, or brown, mothers the world over as I have learned to appreciate with age are the hands that truly rock the cradle with love in every wave.
Though I have physically stopped washing and cooking for my children on a daily basis everyday I wonder what they had for their meals, whether their clothes are clean, whether they miss me as much as I miss them. Once a mother always a mother no matter how old the children are a day, two months, two years, 16, 26, 56 or 90 years old! I sensed the same in my friend who had sent her 20 year old son to military school and she kept checking her email for a loving word even though it had barely been hours and he had gone barely a couple hundred miles away. I experienced the same when I sent my first born son thousands of miles to a new world. As such I understood how she felt and just wanted to be there for her and let her know in a special way that I understood her pain. Everyone born of a woman is blessed because they have the angels to call mother! So we are all lucky because we came from women! I achingly miss my own mother basically everyday! I wish I had shown her more patience and love while I had that angel to hold my hand as I matured.
How do I like being on my own? Of course I like it because I get to do what I want, when I want. I get to eat or sleep when I want and not walk on tiptoes because I might work someone up in the next room. I get to go to the bathroom with my door open, who cares, I am all by myself. However, my home feels so empty without anyone to share in laughs and sorrows on a daily basis! Those giggles that I still hear loudly today as though the kids are just in the next room and it feels like yesterday that they were all babies, but now they have flown away from the nest!
Some of the freedoms I never used to have when I lived with my children or when I had a roommate! I can get to sleep with my TV on all night long watching tennis who cares as long as I am there by myself. However, it is not the same as watching Alex Trebek on jeopardy every evening as we shout the answers as we try to outsmart each other. I miss you all my children, nephews, nieces, cousins, whatever relationship we have, and wherever you are or might be today, for you were all born of a woman like me! Your mother loves you!
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